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Random Observations From The PTA Meeting

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My feelings about the PTA are well documented on this here blog. I have not changed my opinion. I still steer clear. I have not been asked to contribute to the bake sale lately and I probably will not be approached until the current nazi- excuse me, president- is officially overthrown. Some schools seem to have a glorious PTA with truly wonderful people who all work together harmoniously without strife and petty backstabbing. My children do not attend one of those schools. This is the South. Everything you do, say, and wear is subject to judgement, gossip, whispers, and “bless her heart” comments. It should come as no surprise to any of you regular readers that I do not do well in such environments. Unfortunately I recently was conned into attending a PTA meeting. The way they did it was very sneaky, so sneaky in fact that I can almost appreciate the sneakiness. The flier that came home for the 3rd grade chorus program listed the start time as 6:30pm. What wasn’t listed was that it was a PTA meeting that began at 6:30 with the chorus program starting at 7pm. See, sneaky? So we showed up promptly at 6:15pm to get seats up front to avoid dealing with those parents that ruin every school program. 10 minutes later I was wishing we were late and sitting in the back. While I was tuning out some perky little blonde lady drone on and on about buying the correct hand sanitizer for the classrooms (seriously), I paid attention to the parents around me. 

Random Observations from the PTA:

1. Pretty sure the guy 2 rows over wasn’t drinking straight water out of that water bottle. Nobody looks that happy to be drinking water.

2. If you expose 3/4 of your butt every time you bend over, please buy bigger size pants. I’m begging you.

3. Naming your kid Leroy Luther virtually guarantees he will be a serial killer when he grows up. 

4. Handing your toddler a sharpie marker is never a good idea.

5. Sharpie marker does not wipe off of a nice leather Coach purse.

6. There will always be a kid sitting behind you kicking your seat.

7. Falling asleep and almost falling out of your chair will inspire giggles and snorts from everyone around you.

8. Snotty moms breed snotty little girls. 

9. Snotty little girls don’t like to be called out for being snotty.

10. Neither do their snotty moms.

11. I do not belong in the PTA. Duh.

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  • Patience Brown

    I live for your observations. Love your sardonic sense of humour!

    • Thanks 🙂 I consider it my best character trait. Haha!

  • Erin Downing

    My only PTA experience was from the teacher-side of things, but I’m not sure I can believe there are PTA’s were everyone works together in Brady-Bunch style harmony. With that many women involved, I just don’t see how it can be possible.

    • Exactly. Any time I’ve been involved with anything that includes a large group of women there is always strife. The back-stabbing, petty arguments, and mean spirited comments always seem to take over at some point. Women.

  • Francie @ Escovedo Escapades

    Girl, that’s how my son’s elementary school has been conning people into PTA meetings for years! But they also sell pizza and soft drinks at the meetings, so you can stand in line for pizza and not really pay attention. LOL!

    • The only way they’re getting me there again is if they offer free pizza and drinks. I refuse to be held hostage by the PTA anymore!